Bugs! There are bugs everywhere! I hate bugs! Piney continued to think about how much he hated bugs while recklessly steering his flying boat across the skies of Melbourne. Although there weren’t actually any bugs around, Piney was certain they were trying to eat at his succulent pineapple flesh. You see, Piney was absolutely raving mad, due to his sentience being granted through a fusion with a Dr Starkey the Mad. Although Dr Starkey was no more, the remnants of his shattered mind had a profound impact on Piney, who regularly believed he was being eaten by a whole myriad of creatures. Bugs, dogs, sharks; if you could name it, Piney believed it had attempted to eat him.
Piney pulled down his sunglasses, hoping they would stop the bugs from getting to his eyes so that he could concentrate on the open skies ahead. The bugs were so many that for a mad moment, Piney wondered if it would be worth getting boat catch installation and driving his boat around instead. The sentient pineapple was on his way to Australia’s north, where the water is clear as crystal, sparkling in the equatorial sunlight. Perhaps a drive would be more pleasant than flying, given all the airborne bugs.
Over the years, Piney had gotten many modifications to his boat, at a marine welding workshop close to Melbourne. Never had he thought to get some sort of screen that would protect him from the pineapple-hungry bugs. Then again, it wasn’t like the bugs were real at all. But little Piney did made any sense. He had purchased snapper racks and rod holders, although he had never successfully caught a fish (this may have had something to do with the fact that he was attempting to fish in the sky).
Eventually, the imaginary bugs drove Piney so crazy that he decided he would need to land his boat, just to take a break. With all the bugs blocking his vision, however, he didn’t realise how close to the ground he was. Piney flew from the boat as it struck the earth, landing dozens of feet away. Then the boat exploded, leaving Piney stranded in the outback. How will he possibly survive without his trusty boat?